Parmis: I’ve had a lot to say about them over the years. There are two golden rules to chicken parmi etiquette in my books — they should not be stacked and should not cost more than $27 (no pub staple should). But today I am here to discuss size, because size matters right? On a trip to Port Hedland last week it came to my attention that several venues have clearly found some mystery giant chicken producer because the slabs of meat presented on my plate at both the yachtie and Last Chance were more akin to a large horse than a small chicken. Now I have had big parmis before — The Roey across the road from work in Broome puts up a brilliant meal which is too big. Port Hedland is next level though. At the yachtie, served on a very large oval plate, was what I can only assume was a whole emu stacked on top of the chips and everything. It was one of the 20 best parmis I have had in WA, but it does get to a point where if you eat too much of a good thing you just end up feeling average. Two days later at the Last Chance I discovered this was not an isolated incident. The South Hedland pub’s cheap Tuesdays are a revelation — as my colleague’s wild-eyed look while staring down TWO steak sangas on his plate we paid pennies for suggested. But my god, the parmi. It was a full-blown pterodactyl served on a plate the size of our newspaper. It was also very good, was thankfully not stacked and at $20 was one of the best value parmis I have eaten in WA. But again, too much of a good thing for me. Yes I know there is a demographic here that likes to eat big meals, but there are also a lot of normal people who would like a normal meal.